Home
Sarah's Journal
 
[Most Recent Entries] [Calendar View] [Friends]

Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Sarah's LiveJournal:

    [ << Previous 20 ]
    Tuesday, December 24th, 2002
    5:26 pm
    been a long time
    wowzas.....i havent even touched this thing for soo long!! and i was reading the first things i ever posted and i was an idiot. but anyways...life has been ok lately, nothing bad happened to make me cry. man, those 2 weeks really sucked ass!! i think ive cried enough for the year now!! im happy thats all over and i have things to smile about. things are also sooo much better between me and my sister. i hate it when everythings bad...sux ass!! but i still dont know who to choose from!! 2 guys but yet they both have things wrong with them that gives me the reason to not be with them but i want to so bad. yeah, jenny says that im lucky to have 2 guys on me while shes got a playa, but i dont think its that great. yeah im happy cause someone actually likes me, but of course there's gotta be something wrong with them. omg, i thought i was going to write soo much more than this but all of a sudden i got tired and im about to fall on this keyboard...i'll be back later....

    Current Mood: i think that looks cool
    Current Music: shakira-underneath your clothes
    Saturday, June 22nd, 2002
    11:26 pm
    hrmm....i havent really written in here for a while. haha, i was just reading all of my old entries and im such a loser. hahaha...thats when i used wicked!! LOL!! anyways..

    today pretty much sucked! it was the last day of my softball tournament(or at least for my team cause we lost) and i was supposed to pitch but i pulled a muscle in my elbow and then i lost my glove!! thats what happens when people rush you, you dont get everything. other than that i liked the day, i got a lot of sleeping time in. the elbow still hurts though, ice works but not for long

    hopefully my baby gets off being grounded tomorrow!! i miss him soo much. omg, its only been 5 days, how am i going to last on my vacation? ahhh!! at least he's taking me to the airport...he'll be the last person i see!! his dad's soo awesome! hes the one that thought of it, and my sister didnt really want to take me early so she said sure. eew, im going to look like shit cause it going to be like 4 in the morning!! but its alright, he wont look too great either~:-P

    my vacation will hopefully be fun!! disneyworld and getting to see all of my nephews!! i just got close to one that ive only seen once before so it'll be fun to see him even though their house is "boring." it sounds kinda weird to say you're close to a 2 1/2 year old, but i am. and my filipino nephews(the other one is white) love me cause they kinda grew up with me. i also get to see one of my REALLY good friends when i go see them. then from there the trip will be kinda boring but i guess i'll deal with it. thats all i can really do. i love my dogs so i'll just stay with them and listen to music! SHIT! i dont have a cd player so i guess im not listening to music. whatever....

    its pretty late so im gonna go to sleep. maybe i'll write again soon...

    Current Mood: calm
    Current Music: Forgive....Rebecca Lynn Howard
    Sunday, March 10th, 2002
    12:26 pm
    just wanted to write something because i havent for soo many months. there's nothing really to write though and the things that are on my mind i dont really want to write about. stupid entry but thats about it.












    I LOVE TONY

    Current Mood: depressed
    Current Music: i could fall in love-selena
    Wednesday, October 10th, 2001
    8:23 pm
    . . : : h o l a : : . .
    hey hey...long time no write. i meant to write my latest poems on here but i didnt. oh well. uhh...yeah~life gets better and better as the day goes on. i like a couple people but then none of them would go out with me. and people i have never seen in my life before like me cause my friends are telling me that. jeez...i need to pee....hehe...that was random. anyways..i dont know what to write except for all these stupid random things so im just going to go and keep talkin to landon on the phone.

    Current Mood: cheerful
    Wednesday, September 12th, 2001
    6:51 pm
    meant to write it yesterday
    Some people woke up today
    Thinking the day was going to be great
    But then a tradegy happened
    On the east at about late eight

    A plane crashed into a building
    It's called the World Trade Center
    Then shortly thereafter, it happened again
    To it's Twin's Tower

    Many people are crushed
    Especially those families
    But whoever did this
    Is of course, now our enemies

    How do you think those kids feel
    To go to an empty home
    Finding out they have no more parents
    They're going to grow up, living on their own

    Most people think this will bring us to war
    God, oh jeez...let's hope it don't
    But let's just all pray
    And hopefully, maybe it won't

    Almost everyone wants world peace
    Or at least thats what Miss Congeniality said
    But showing all this hate
    Is how everything got lead

    This will leave a dent in our hearts
    Which we will never recover
    And whoevers in charge of this
    Hopfully their name will be discovered

    Current Mood: pessimistic
    Current Music: Blaque...808 Remix
    Monday, September 10th, 2001
    6:35 pm
    GUYS SUCK!
    lifes a bitch when it comes to guys. they believe everyone else and not you, and they break you heart. why is that? just because your not where they are anymore, they believe everyone else, and they break all the promises they made. argh!!! why do they have to be like this? they totally suck!!! argh!!!!!!! IM PISSED OFF! WHY DO THEY BELIEVE OTHER PEOPLE(LIKE ENEMIES) INSTEAD OF THE PERSON THEY LOVE?!?!?!

    Current Mood: pissed off
    Current Music: smooth criminal....alien ant farm
    Saturday, September 1st, 2001
    4:19 pm
    . . : : hola : : . .
    no reason to write...just bored and have nothing else to do. umm...what to write about?~oh yeah....

    hehe...my party was great! yeah~:P~! it'll be better next week!! but i still dont get if chrystal is the person that told rorye no one was going to show up, then why did she show up with other people? oh well~it was still fun and i met 3 guys. one of them was kinda cute~but that one guy is still wicked hot~:P~!!!!! hehe.

    school is pretty fun but i hate my geochemistry class. its fun because of whos at my table and i can stare at this cute guy all period long...but everyone hates the teacher! hes so gay and talks about errelivent(dont know how to spell) things! "yeah...i'd outlaw backpacks in the classroom just because i dont like them!!" and all this other shit thats totally stupid and gay like him. he needs to find out what year he's in and stop wearing tight bellbottoms! thats really nasty!~! egh!!

    wellz...ima go now! pEaCe~!

    Current Mood: hot
    Current Music: that song by city high...i dont know names of songs...
    Wednesday, August 29th, 2001
    9:51 pm
    life is getting better....
    hola~!~! well...the first day of school was pretty good because i met this one girl from florida who was really cool. i think we'll be becoming really good friends because we both know no one. well~i mean i know a lot of people but i dont hang out with them because i dont think that they really remember me much.

    lacey(the girl) and i saw a wicked hot guy on the first day and i see him everyday now. on the second day she found a guy that she thought was wicked hot and he is! so we freak out everytime we see both of them because...i dont know...but they are hot!!

    today was a pretty good day! my sister was even suked about it when i told her what went on. first is started out with french II class. the first and second day is regular days that are 54 minutes long and we just chose our own seats. but today was a lab day and we have double time so we had to get assigned seats. the girl in front of me thought it was pretty cool that we had our own little row and we're both sarah, so she started to talk to me. i asked her how to say a couple things for our assignment and one thing had to do with what year i was born~and she found out i was a freshman. then just about the rest of the class did too~and i was the talk of the class for a couple minutes. then the 2 cute guys in my class were amazed by that and they've been talking to me. i mean, they're talkative so they werent just talkin to me, but they actually started to so that made me happy. and i see one of them everywhere!! every class im walkin to i'll hear my name being called and i turn around and its brandon! is he stalking me?

    next thing...hmm...what was it....? oh~ok!! well~the bell rang and lacey was going to walk me to my class then turn around and go to her class. so we were walking and all of a sudden i see the girl like walk out of her group to say hi to me and i was thinking that she was familar. she was like, "yeah your in my...uhh...oh gosh i cant remember the class!!" then at the same time we were like.."OH YEAH! CHOIR!" then she turned and looked at lacey and was like, "oh yeah! and your in my biology class!!" so she was talkin to us and asked us like who we hang out with, and of course its no one else but just us. so she was sayin to meet her every day at lunch by the D building lockers to hang out with her. then this guy i knew since like...1st grade came up to say hi to her and then he looked at me. so i just sat there and we were staring at each other(weird moment...2 people staring at each other that are like...2 feet away) and he was like,"your name is sarah right?" and i was like...yeah~i remember you too! so we were talkin for a little bit and its pretty cool now because we talk now and every time he sees me he says hi. which after that was a lot!! i would think so but i saw him like...5 times from lunch-5th period-walking-after school-jack in the box!! i was like...what the heck! but its pretty cool cause i remember him as scrawny and he looks pretty buff now! hes a cutie! not quite hot~but i know he'll get there!!

    so that was my day...and i surprisingly did my homework~and i think i did more than what i was supposed to. so i think that this year is going to be a good year because i havent given up on my homework yet!! but im going to go cause its 10~and i gotta wake up at 5:35!! pEaCe~!

    Current Mood: shocked
    Sunday, August 26th, 2001
    2:34 am
    thinking about someone im not allowed to think about...
    falling in love is fun...but not when your not allowed to fall in love with that person. age shouldnt matter...you may think that someone is old when they're 18 going out with a 13 year old. but look at soo many married couples...they're pretty far apart in age. my parents are 7 years~so i dont see whats wrong with 5. people cant tell you who to fall in love with if you want to fall in love with that person. you shouldnt be restricted from talking and seeing that person just because your in love at the "wrong age." there is no certain age to fall in love...and theres no age limit to who you can fall in love with. just my luck~i fell in love with someone that was sweet, good looking, funny, and all of the above, but i wasnt allowed to go out with. too bad i already did...and it messed up my life just because my parents didnt like the age. but i dont care...because he will always be in my heart and it hurts to know that the one person that was VERY special to me i know i wont be able to see again in my life. especially when you were supposed to marry the person(hehe) and that person loved to be with you. that person wished to be with you every night and day but couldnt, so he would be every chance that he got. i might be rambling on and on about something and some of it might not make sense...but i just know that my heart will always have a huge space for the one person i was totally infactuated with and i fell in love with. i love him and i always will..but like i said~it hurts to know that i probably wont see him again in my whole life...i plan to see him in heaven....

    If I'm not in love with you
    What is this I'm going through
    Tonight
    And if my heart is lying then
    What should I believe in
    Why do I go crazy
    Every time I think about you, baby
    Why else do I want you like I do
    If I'm not in love with you

    And if I don't need your touch
    Why do I miss you so much
    Tonight
    If it?s just infatuation then
    Why is my heart aching
    To hold you forever
    Give a part of me I thought I?d never
    Give again to someone I could lose
    If I'm not in love with you

    Why in every fantasy
    Do I feel your arms embracing me
    Lovers lost in sweet desire
    Why in dreams do I surrender
    Lying with you baby
    Someone help explain this feeling
    Someone tell me

    If I'm not in love with you
    What is this I'm going through
    Tonight
    And if my heart is lying then what should I believe in
    Why do I go crazy
    Every time I think about you baby
    Why else do I want you like I do
    If I'm not in love with you

    Current Mood: indescribable
    Current Music: If I'm Not in Love With You-Faith Hill
    Wednesday, August 22nd, 2001
    9:30 pm
    ITS REALLY PISSIN ME OFF HOW PEOPLE WRITE SHIT AS COMMENTS AND THEY PUT IT AS ANNONYMOUS!! IF THEY WANT TO SAY SHIT THEN THEY SHOULD SAY WHO THE HELL THEY ARE. ITS FUCKIN STUPID TO SIT THERE AND WRITE SHIT ABOUT ME WHEN YA'LL PROBABLY DONT EVEN KNOW ME AND THATS WHAT FUCKIN PISSES ME OFF EVEN MORE!~!~! YA KNOW WHAT?~JUST FUCK EVERYTHING. LIFES A BITCH AND I MIGHT AS WELL JUST DIE AND MAKE EVERYONE HAPPY!!

    Current Mood: bitchy
    Monday, August 20th, 2001
    12:31 am
    whats the points of the subject when you talk about it in your event anywayz?
    i dont know what to talk about. i just came online and i dont really feel like sleeping.

    Talked to that wicked hot guy yesterday. havent talked to him in a while so i guess you can say i was happy. ive also been talkin to my chingoo often but she doesnt stay on that long to talk. and when im on the phone with her she just says to go online. i dont know~but i just think she doesnt really want to talk to me for some reason?!? thats just what im thinking, but who knows?

    all you people living on the east are SOOO lucky cause if you want to watch the little league baseball tomorrow with new york and whoever the other team is...you can wake up at 10. but i have to wake up at 8!! argh~!~! and i dont think i can watch the whole game either because i have to go to the school councelor to get my classes. but i WILL be home to watch OCEANSIDE WIN!!! some of them guys are cute...too bad they're like 12!! one of them looks like my best buddy back in korea. aww~i miss him!! but yeah...GO OCEANSIDE!!!!

    like ive said before, lifes getting a little better. my sister invited me to go to the beach on wednesday. i dont know who all it is going to be, and it would be nice to have it be just me and her. she got hella dark today when she went...and if i got that dark...i would stop compaining on how "white" i am!!

    ok~im supposed to have this party going on but then like my friend thats helping me with it told me that it was this saturday and told the other girl thats helping that its next saturday. it would be nice if she felt like getting together with us to plan this a little bit more. cause it wouldnt be that nice to get it all planned out and start telling people the day before that theres a party. shes such a messed up kid but i guess its aight. shes my good friend...

    well...i think im gonna go because i have a busy day tomorrow thats going to start early!! pEaCe~!

    Current Mood: blank
    Current Music: whatever it is that this game is playing...
    Friday, August 17th, 2001
    8:39 pm
    i dont know...
    yeah~im just really really bored! there is absolutly nothing to do right now so i felt like writing something.

    wellz...my life is getting kinda better i guess. im working at tryin to look happy and be nice to my family. that was a big issue. its just really hard to do all that when your depressed becaues of the place that your in. but...im starting to get used to that too and i guess today was the only day i was cheerful. thats pretty good...

    i got to talk to me chingoo today, she told me about her exciting life!!! i really wish i was back there and everything. id make her come home and tell me everything that happened with SPG!! hehe...but im not there...and i cant really do anything about that. she always gets the hot guyz...lucky siekya!! hehe~j/k!! but yeah...she does.

    havent talked to that wicked hot guy in a while. wonder where he's been!?! oh well i guess. i was going to call him a couple times today but it was too late...and i didnt want to bug him again on his cell phone. wasnt sure if he'd want me to and get annoyed or something. yeah...that would suck i guess. wonder how he's been lately...hmm...MuLaYo~!!~!!

    but...ima go now because i gotta e-mail some peeps and i need to fine a light for my room so that i can clean it up a little. i got the rest of my stuff today and i have no clue what to do with half of it but yet i know what to do with the other half. so its like...some stuff is going to go places, but the stuff thats just sitting there and i have no clue where im going to put is in the way. so i'll probably be up all night tryin to find all my stuff and get my room clean. lets hope it looks nice when its done!!

    pEaCe~!

    Current Mood: sad
    12:40 pm
    Have you ever loved someone and they had absolutely no idea whatsoever? Or fell for you're best friend in the entire world, and then sat around and watched him/her fall for someone else?

    Have you ever denied your feelings for someone because your fear of rejection was too hard to handle? We tell lies when we are afraid.... afraid of what we don't know, afraid of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out about us. But every time we tell a lie...the thing we fear grows stronger.

    Have you ever noticed that the worst way to miss someone is when they are right beside you and yet you can never have them...when the moment you can't feel them under your fingertips you miss them?

    Have you ever wondered which hurts the most; saying something and wishing you had not, or saying nothing and wishing you had? I guess the most important things are the hardest things to say. Don't be afraid to tell someone you love them. If you do, they might break your heart ... but if you don't, you might break theirs.

    Have you ever decided not to become a couple because you were so afraid of losing what you already had with that person? Your heart decides who it likes and who it doesn't. You can't tell your heart what to do. It does it on its own... when you least suspect it, or even when you don't want it to.

    Have you ever wanted to love someone with everything you had, but that other person was too afraid to let you?

    Too many of us stay walled because we are too afraid to care too much...for fear that the other person does not care as much, or that all Life is all about risks and it requires you to jump. Don't be a person who has
    to look back and wonder what they would have, or could have had.

    Current Mood: energetic
    Current Music: Somewhere Out There...
    Tuesday, August 14th, 2001
    1:19 pm
    sux not knowing people where you live...

    Current Mood: bored
    Sunday, August 12th, 2001
    9:43 pm
    life sux...
    well lifes a bitch! thank god guys actually tell the truth though...too bad it was fucking a year and a half after we were going out that he tells me all this shit. yeah~what a great guy i went out with! then after he was telling me everything that he did while we were going out he told me he loved me. what kind of shit was that? am i supposed to believe him or was that his "sorry i did that"? why do i get all the sweet talkers? really sucks...because afterwards all i feel like is used. like no one really cares about me. really sux! been hurt a lot now~especially how he seemed to say everything like he didnt care he was hurting me. wait...but he would say i love you again~does that me he does care? cause it used to seem like he cared soo much about me but then at the same time he said he cared so much...he was off doing shit with my 2 worst enemies. yeah~he really cared. i should just be done with guys now. i dont know who i can trust because im known as the "slut that'll do anything." so every guy that wants something comes to me and sweet talks and i fall for it. so then i go off and do something and afterwards i get a goodbye! not all guys are like this and im happy. theres some out there that are good like that...for example...the wicked hot guy...he just said he never cheated on a girlfriend and he plans on not cheating(i guess you would say in different words). thats a pretty good guy. out of all the boyfriends ive had...3 of them would never hurt me. but i hurt them because i was stupid. life really sucks...and i guess i have to go on with it. its a routine thing with all the guys i get...might as well get used to it. i guess i cant do anything about it. all i can do is sit here and wish for a dream guy that i know would i would never get....and theres one already in mind....

    Current Mood: crushed
    Saturday, August 11th, 2001
    10:04 pm
    ..::im bored::..
    nothin to write about....but im tryin to check out to see if my little icon thing works...hehe~:P~!

    Current Mood: bored
    2:41 pm
    wow~that thing i wrote was pretty long. i think i sounded pretty stupid in it...but i dont know...just writing a whole bunch of shit that was on my mind...still thinkin bout the WICKED HOT guy...nothing new. hehe...gonna go now...
    1:04 pm
    thinkin bout it....
    ive been thinking about him a lot today and what we were talking about last night. and i was soo syked that he might come to san diego and everything but then i thought about it and it wouldnt actually be for a long time. cause i know it wouldnt be any time soon so we would probably be over each other. actually...im not sure if i would be over him(takes me a while to get over boyz) but then i dont know what he would be. he'd probably have a girlfriend or something and not even think of me. then there would be no point in him coming here except to go surfing and come back for a vacation. so maybe im just getting my hopes up knowing he might come here or i should actually look forward to it(if he was even going to come) what if i had a boyfriend(small possibility)and he came. what would happen then? i would see him once and introduce him to my boyfriend and never see him again or like...what? it sucks being so far away from someone that your like...seriously into. even if you've only met the person a couple times...i believe in love at first sight and infactuation. also, he was talking about he was thinking about going to UCSD. so i started to daydream away and i was like...what if he came here and he went to UCSD?~i would be a junior then. what if we were a little couple~wow! that would be a dream come true. and when i graduated we were to move in some place together~wow! that would be great(this is where it makes me sound like a psycho~talkin about movin in with someone i dont even have a relationship with). but what if he like...came to college here and he was with a girlfriend...and he moved in some place with her?! yeah~there goes my dream down the drain. he has 2 years of school left and i have 4. i dont know who im going to meet and he probably doesnt know who he's going to meet. would it be like...we met someone and never talked again because we were with that person or what? we sit here and talk about how we like each other but then we dont know what can happen because we're miles and miles and MILES apart. i would be the happiest person alive if what we've been talkin about happened but then what would i do if it didnt? did i just think of soo many stupid things just to make my life actually a little bit exciting and to make me a little bit happier? or would it be that im actually looking forward to things that are going to happen cause its what we plan? who knows? cause no one knows the future and damn, i wish i did so i know what would go on with my life. cause then i wouldnt get my hopes up and make my life even more depressing then it is. but then...why am i sitting here blabbing on and on about it? amd i seriously going to stress about it this much? probably! cause like...i dont know...hes such a hottie...girls will go after him...he'll go after those girls...and he'll think~WHO'S SARAH?! but i'll still be sitting here dreaming...yey! he might go to college here! we can hook up! yey~! but then there goes my dreams floating around my head again. what if i was sitting here talking about all this stuff because im worried he wont like me once he finds some girl of his dreams? thats probably what i am sitting here writing this for. hey..you never know...he actually might hook up with that girl he thinks is mad fine that was in the play. i know shes a lot prettier than me. a LOT of people are prettier than me. so yeah...now i think that im just sitting here...thinking of what to say...and a whole bunch of stupid stuff just keeps on coming out. wonder what he'll think when he reads this~"shes going psycho and talking about the future. she sounds soo fucking in love with me its crazy. i should stop talkin to her so that she stops dreaming all this stupid shit." thats what he's probably thinking...but yeah...cha never know. im gonna go...i think im done talkin all my stupid stuff~pEaCe~!
    Friday, August 10th, 2001
    11:40 pm
    mung chungy.....hehe....
    omg~i feel soo stupid. but i guess its aight. the wicked hot guy found my little journal. yey~i sound like a little obsessive psycho and he got to read all of it~:P~hehe. yeah~when he told me he read it my heart was beating pretty fast...but when he told me he just about felt the same way~it skipped a bunch of beats. whoah...im a pretty happy camper now i guess. hehe. wow~and we both thought the same thing...or maybe hes just a sweet talker~:P~!! but we both thought that we didnt have a chance with each other, but my little journal was read and now we all know the truth. wow~hehe. he might go to college here...and he might come to visit this place cause his mom loves it here. thats pretty cool~!~! yup yup...so i know i'll see him again~cause i always believe in that. im going to see all my friends again that ive had to move away from. but anywayz~yeah~this wicked hot guy likes me to talk about him...so i'll try not to go talking about other people..hehe....but wow! im just like whoah...he feels the same way about me. was this like a dream come true or something? a hot guy..that i met up with 4 times...and is a JUNIOR feels the same way that i feel for him(or so he says). wow~a JUNIOR! and he thought he didnt have a chance. a hot junior, that used to live in san diego, pretty pretty eyes(they better not be contacts cause now i feel really stupid), and i and a voice im in love with, thinks he didnt have a chance with a freshman...come on now. i actually think his voice is what i fell in love with first. really...i think it was. ok...well...i think im going to go set up my bed now...change into what he first saw me in~:P~and get some sleep. oh yeah...i stole his number from my best friend(i know that was mean i guess)and maybe i'll call him if he doesnt care. that would be cool~but for right now....pEaCe~!
    11:28 pm
    mung chungy.....hehe....
    omg~i feel soo stupid. but i guess its aight. the wicked hot guy found my little journal. yey~i sound like a little obsessive psycho and he got to read all of it~:P~hehe. yeah~when he told me he read it my heart was beating pretty fast...but when he told me he just about felt the same way~it skipped a bunch of beats. whoah...im a pretty happy camper now i guess. hehe. wow~and we both thought the same thing...or maybe hes just a sweet talker~:P~!! but we both thought that we didnt have a chance with each other, but my little journal was read and now we all know the truth. wow~hehe. he might go to college here...and he might come to visit this place cause his mom loves it here. thats pretty cool~!~! yup yup...so i know i'll see him again~cause i always believe in that. im going to see all my friends again that ive had to move away from. but anywayz~yeah~this wicked hot guy likes me to talk about him...so i'll try not to go talking about other people..hehe....but wow! im just like whoah...he feels the same way about me. was this like a dream come true or something? a hot guy..that i met up with 4 times...and is a JUNIOR feels the same way that i feel for him(or so he says). wow~a JUNIOR! and he thought he didnt have a chance. a hot junior, that used to live in san diego, pretty pretty eyes(they better not be contacts cause now i feel really stupid), and i and a voice im in love with, thinks he didnt have a chance with a freshman...come on now. i actually think his voice is what i fell in love with first. really...i think it was. ok...well...i think im going to go set up my bed now...change into what he first saw me in~:P~and get some sleep. oh yeah...i stole his number from my best friend(i know that was mean i guess)and maybe i'll call him if he doesnt care. that would be cool~but for right now....pEaCe~!
[ << Previous 20 ]
My Website   About LiveJournal.com

Advertisement